John O’Regan

John O’Regan is an Irish writer / artist / language teacher, now based in Spain with a number of pieces (short stories, play extracts, poems) published in the Stinging Fly, West 47 etc. He has had three plays produced in Galway over the years. He writes sporadically, whenever the muse instructs, having learned not to force the writing in any way.

 

Getting to the Point.

(1)

Well there’s that…….yes, and more…..  it piles up doesn’t it….. one outrage on top another till you’re so crammed full of it that….. what…… so crammed full of it that what?…… try another tack…..

I get to a thinking sometimes about the ifs and buts and whys and wherefores…..of it all I mean…..and each time I come to the same conclusion….. that I’ve been sold a dud….that we’ve been sold a dud…..duped… all of us… no-one’s immune….. You might escape, temporarily…. You might purchase a bicycle….it’s been known to happen…. You might purchase a bicycle, helmet, panniers…. along with a tent, stove, sleeping bag….. all the necessaries… and simply take off…..ride off into the sunset…… until you come to a hairpin bend, for example,…. on a hill… a steep hill…. and you convince yourself that enlightenment lies at the crest of the hill….. But your courage fails you doesn’t it…… that’s not even a question….it’s a simple statement of fact…..your courage always fails you…. your self belief evaporates….. at least it did…..

You might come across an old man, sitting, reading a newspaper…..sometimes, not always….. and you might think: well he must know something….stands to reason….law of averages…. I mean you read enough newspapers you’re bound to come across some sliver of wisdom aren’t you….some slight insight into the human condition….. but all he cares about are the damned lottery numbers and whether today’s a good day for Scorpios to make a small investment….. I despair…. at least I did….

Sometimes I stand still ….do you?…. I stand completely still and look up….on the street maybe….. I pick the most innocuous window or wall or street sign I can find and I stand perfectly still and look up at it……  I don’t mean to gather a crowd…. I never mean to…per se….. it just happens…… before I know it I’m surrounded …ten, twenty, thirty people….all looking up at the wall….. and I can hear their silent questioning…. It grows louder and louder….. but I refuse to answer….despite the blows, the spittle, the venom, the insults……

I like things that are red, all things incarnadine.

Janine is a real woman….. both in herself and in her relations with the world of men….. she requires no affirmation…. she’s entirely indifferent…… the less she says the more I like it…. we rarely speak now…. in fact we never speak…..she gets more fascinating by the day, the hour, the minute……it’s got so that I can hardly take my eyes off her…… her merest gesture speaks volumes….. I live in a permanently orgasmic state….my life is one continuous orgasm…..all thanks to silent Janine…..its hell on earth……. I hate her so much I could die….. I love her so much I could die….

I’m not so fond of blue….as much as red I mean……. It lacks frivolity…..blue is serious…..not for the feint of heart…. Blue requires commitment….a plan…. a moral purpose…. a vision ….of a better tomorrow….. I’m waiting for a better tomorrow….and it’s coming….. waves of it…. a tsunami of improvement in all departments….. the joy will be insurmountable….I guarantee it…. We will all succumb to it….. the endless days of joyfulness, enrapturement …..bliss….. I can feel it coming ….any day now we will see the first swells on the horizon and watch it grow and grow……tell me you can feel it….. it’s what’s been promised after all….. the prophesy if you will….. we will stand on the beach….holding hands….together….. the towering waves of joy will thunder over us…….we will succumb to it…..smiling…. I will be smiling…..the world too….it will be our final triumph…..we will triumph over all obstacles on that day….. I love my life.

 

(11)

When I was young there was very little that needed to be taken into account……. I have tried to maintain this approach…..this tone, into adulthood…..detachment….. to such things as trends, for example,…. and words…… those too.

Reptiles I approve of….on the whole….. they know something very, very profound…..something to do with continuity I’d say, at a guess. And when I say ‘know’ I don’t mean know in the way we humans know things…… for example they don’t mourn the dead of their own species, like we do….. they neither anticipate nor fear their own demise any more than they regret it……when we see them standing on a rock in the Galapagos, sunning themselves, they are not trembling with fear…..they are simply shaking off the torpor induced by a cold night spent on an exposed coastline…… I have this on the highest authority……

There are many things I could say…. I have a lot to say…. A lot of thoughts that have outdone their usefulness….to me…. I share them willingly….I am not greedy… I am known for my generosity and willingness to share of my goods and chattels…. You may have them…… with my blessings…. And those of Janine also….. she hasn’t said so but we share the same sense of wanting to contribute something…..give something back…..to a world that has been so good to us….. we are billionaires …. we own everything …. we have been exceptionally lucky…… and this is what I’ve been getting at…. We own everything you see around you….all the land, the trees, the drains, manhole covers, ice-cream parlours, hedge-clippings, all of it ….as well as all the properties….for miles….in every direction…. which, by definition, is vastly more that we need to keep body and soul together……. You are welcome to come and visit…. take what you need….within reason……. We own it all you see…… We happen to think that’s the way it should be….. We have been very fortunate….that we own it all through our own efforts and our own merit…. unlike you…..

 

(111)

But I see I’ve been dancing around the issue, so to speak…… so here it is, the issue I wish to address….now that I have a captive audience, hanging upon my every word…… it’s the central issue, the one which ultimately concerns us all, and the answer to which determines our peace of mind…. in the medium to long term. I speak of course about the burning issue of the day…. the one that’s on everyone’s lips, day and night, dominating the airwaves, causing rancorous debate within and without the walls of our public institutions, the cause of protest, mayhem, chaos on the street, where a citizen is no longer safe to walk to the greengrocers lest they….lest they….

Janine sends her love and asks to mention in particular her thanks for the beautiful gift you sent her for her birthday….. it was very thoughtful of you….. she says you shouldn’t have but I disagreed…. I think you should…. And I’m glad you did or I would have become annoyed…… I mean more annoyed than usual because you have always annoyed me, as you know, so this will come as no surprise. In fact, coming straight to the point, you make me sick and I detest the ground you walk on….. when I see you I can barely maintain a civil tongue, which is mostly due to Janine’s calming influence. You see if ever I were provoked into an act of homicide, you would be the most likely candidate……. Which has been my point all along, despite the hairpins and the reptiles and the sleeping bags and the Scorpios and the manhole covers and the god damned blessings….. my central point has been as follows……

Anyway……glad we got all that cleared up. Let’s get together as soon as poss.

All he best. Terry.

 

© 2018 John O’Regan